To the people of the State of Dabar who wondered whatever happened to that wonderful place that brought you Jay Ayima, Options N Upshots, Superhero Down, and the ever-beloved Meet The Dolphynes…
It got quiet out here for a good while. Life was absolutely doing its thing and leaving us on catch-up duty for a while there. But…
WE’RE BAAAAAAAACK!!!!!!
The State made a GLORIOUS return in the final quarter of 2022, and brought with it five new stories. Now, while I will leave the rankings to the Head of the State, here’s a small sample of thoughts on what we brought you this year. These are in no order, let’s begin.
OPERATION MILK JOE
To all the Moyos, Ketis and Dr. Kiros out there with the biases against albinos (and other marginalized groups, honestly,) I have one question for you: How do you sleep well at night?
The belief that killing someone else makes you successful without consequence has always been a strange one to me, seeing how there’s literally a saying that you reap what you sow. If you sow chaos to be successful, will your success truly be without the fruits of trouble?
Side note: The dynamic between Moyo and Keti: Pure buffoonery. I still can’t believe Moyo actually thought it would be a good idea to sit in the open…with an unconscious human! No wonder Keti just chose not to mind him.
In the end, Nathan came through, but on the low, I was a bit irritated with him. One day less and he could’ve saved two people instead of one. But alas, we take the good we can, don’t we?
YOU’RE GONNA REGRET THIS
This one, dear me. The only story more twisted than this one in Dabarverse might be Jay Ayima (which, if you haven’t read yet, I would strongly advise you to read in short order.)
First of all, roaches during hanky panky? ROACHES? THE BIRD IS IN THE HOLE? Someone clearly channeled his inner Jordan Peele for this one in a wonderful manner. Sean takes his time in setting up this one, weaving the episodes together with one ominous thread. I never know what to expect in each one, but I know its definitely going to be worse than the one before.
This story manages to produce a Hall of Shame candidate in Faisal. With his brash attitude and thirst for vawulence, its surprising he didn’t actually die by the same. I still feel bad for his partner Jake on account of the fact that he actually died, when he was the one person between them who had enough of a conscience to make different choices. Loyalty to Faisal’s really what did him in. But, Faisal’s eventual madness really was the best punishment for him. If one spends one’s time torturing others and striking fear into them just for the heck of it, it’s only right that revenge is served in the form of perpetual mental torture. He got what was coming to him, and right when he was at his most vulnerable spot too. Nice of him to show emotion right before he lost his ability to.
“Brady” really was the one person to have enough sense to change. Then again, if I were bombarded with roaches while I was in the middle of an erotic engagement with a girl I had meant for so long, I’d also most definitely reconsider a number of decisions I’d made. His decision to split with the boys may actually be the hardest part of that dynamic; it’s never easy to walk away from brothers and good friends. But, we find one important truth in his action: You can’t move forward with people who want to remain where they are.
He tried to save them and get them to change, but he basically had to destroy Faisal’s face before he realized these were old dogs; they weren’t interested in new tricks. Once he realized it, he chose to save himself, escaped death in the process, and ended up with the better part of everything he’d had before.
In the end, the title of the story proved true in more ways than one, and only the one who really became a better person survived.
GREEN WOUNDS
Where do I begin with this one… Basilisk Garrison! I’m honestly still salty about the fact that Koni never got what he deserved for wrecking an innocent man’s life for no good reason. And the fact that he ended up running the revenge hit for the same man fifteen years later? The injustice!
Also, Romeo…dear goodness me. Did this man never hear Hamilton when he said “I am not throwing away my, SHOT!” The fact that he got a third chance in a place which deletes humans for a living, and still managed to commit logic-defying atrocities? That consequence he faced was well-earned.
Gilbert may be the most cliché idiot the state’s seen since Archibald “Desert Eagle.” Borrow money from a friend, refuse to pay it back, have said friend beaten and paralyzed, and then go on to live a lavish lifestyle with a girl on your arm. Even worse, go to this ex-friend’s wife’s café to eat after doing all this to him and her. … … …Huh?
I will admit to being in a real moral conundrum with this one. I have a personal preference for Barbara’s way of thinking (vengeance belongs to God,) but I also fully understood Barry’s position. His life was forever changed, and the one who did him evil continued to walk free. That theme is the subject of many an all-night, and I have no disagreement with my man’s decision to get his pound of flesh in a quicker fashion. Green Wounds managed to put me at odds with my own self, and I couldn’t help but wonder why the appetite for vengeance is innate, yet the better option is almost always to take the peaceful route.
That said, he who lives by the sword, dies by the sword. The progression of Barry’s bitterness caused him to make some surprisingly dumb verbal choices, and he paid for that with the quickest “Oh, one more thing.”
In the end, the moral of this one is really a question all of us should ask before we take any action: Is it really worth it?
IN THE CAR
Joelah might be one of the few women in State lore whom one wouldn’t advocate for violence against, but wouldn’t say anything if it happened. I bet a majority of you had a lot to say about Miss Indecisive’s approach to her relationship with Abrefa, and your opinions were in full agreement with Abilene and Joey. Talk about trying to eat one’s cake and have it. She wanted the perks, but not the commitment.
Also, isn’t it better to tell someone you’re not interested, as against ghosting them?
After almost giving up on account of losing his mind, here comes Mezi. The joy this woman brought to Abrefa is one that people only dream of, and it made his wait fully worth it. The story as a whole is a timely reminder in a world of rushed partnerships that patience pays off in the end. It’s always worth finding the best person for one; the right person.
POWER COUPLE
Hmm. Dear me, dear me… hmm! I’m quite sure I speak for the entire State of Dabar when I say that this is the wildest, raunchiest story we’ve had so far. From start to finish, it is hedonism galore, and it would really be a straight-up tale of debauchery if it didn’t have so much deception and so many twists.
First off: Stella. The fact that she is as central to the present troubles the Bentons face as she was to their rise in the past was the most shocking part of the tale. Her understanding of what everyone needed and how to move them at will remains a superpower I wish I’d had. From the looks of things, we might be finding out more about her in the sequel. That is if Kay’s teaser of an ending is anything to go by.
Caris may be the most intriguing character for me, simply because he really had no reason to be anywhere near that life. I guess if his father had had a different approach, he very well might’ve stayed on the straight and narrow. But love, and a heavy dose of Carol’s goodies, sent him right into a life of crime. It’s often said that one’s partner in life is one of the most crucial decisions one could ever make, and it couldn’t be more true here. Carol brought out the wild side of him, and he did the same for her, and they managed to breeze through life with absolute, unapologetic perversion. And now, they find themselves in the jaws of death, about to be swallowed whole. I wonder what fate awaits them.
In the end, life would’ve remained great if everyone had played their roles perfectly. With Goosman as an executor, that was never going to happen. A dead body found after ten years in good enough condition as to be identifiable? Man, what a failure. It just goes to show: No secret ever stays that way forever.
Happy New Year to all of you, and cheers to more wonderful stories and memorable characters!